June 26, 2018 (this day)

My daughter’s wedding was lovely, and as I predicted, no one worried about my drinking.  I worried, though, about everyone else’s drinking.  Every family wedding is ruined at least a bit by a family drunk.  They are related to me by blood, by marriage, and by adoption.  They are the ones who are clearly alcoholic and drink too much each and every time and they are the ones who usually drink with no problem and they are the ones who never drink.  I was determined to do what I could to prevent this from happening this time.  I was honestly grim, and tense, but I successfully cut one off and maybe cut another down.  The drunk this time was one who never drinks.  This time he did.  He was drunk before I knew what was happening, but he laid down in his car and didn’t cause a catastrophe.

Ug.  I came out of the whole thing telling Carole I LOVE my sober AA friends and my sober AA gatherings.  We didn’t have alcohol at our wedding and if anyone was shocked and dismayed, they didn’t tell me so.  It’s not ideal that I was very tense for my daughter’s wedding but maybe it gave me a focus other than that I was losing my “next of kin” status with her.

It was a great success, and she is great success, and I am a great success, at least as far as alcohol is concerned, for the past 34 years and for today.  I “have recovered from a seemingly hopeless condition of mind and body.”  I thought more than once about the people who were not present that day because alcohol took them out of her life – her father, my uncle, my father.  I hope it’s obvious, but to put it bluntly I do not regret my sobriety.  It has no down side.

6 thoughts on “June 26, 2018 (this day)

  1. That’s awesome! And it’s so lovely for me to read this because I am just five months sober, yet this allows me to envisage with hope in my heart that I’ll be sober on my son’s wedding day (as I write this, he is 13 so it’s far, far into the future). 34 years! To say that you’re a success is an understatement. Thank you for sharing and thank you for giving me hope. Anna x

    • Ha, no! My daughter doesn’t want kids, and my son, as far as I can tell, couldn’t be bothered. It’s actually a challenge of this phase of my life to accept that I probably won’t have any grandkids. It makes me very sad and I have to use each and every tool of the program on it (including the one that tells me I really don’t know what the future holds). Thanks again.

      • Sorry to hear this is difficult. I do/did other things for society because of not having kids. Like taking interns and really helping them along. Teach Dutch to foreigners. It is not the same. But then part of it is. 🙂
        Sending hugs.
        xx, Feeling

  2. Your posts are great, and give hope to everyone who reads them.
    The numbers are good, but it only happens one day at a time, and the reminder that the rewards are worth it are invaluable

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