Baleful Results (Step Three continued)

We realize that the word “dependence” is as distasteful to many psychiatrists and psychologists as it is to alcoholics. Like our professional friends, we, too, are aware that there are wrong forms of dependence. We have experienced many of them. No adult man or woman, for example, should be in too much emotional dependence upon a parent. They should have been weaned long before, and if they have not been, they should wake up to the fact. This very form of faulty dependence has caused many a rebellious alcoholic to conclude that dependence of any sort must be intolerably damaging. But dependence upon an A.A. group or upon a Higher Power hasn’t produced any baleful results.

I’m struggling right now to regain emotional and mental equilibrium.  I’ve been protesting against many of my elected officials and I think I’ve found some good ways to do that for the time being.  I’d like to give part of my day, every day, to it, and leave it the rest of the time.  This I am not able to do.  I’m not sure what’s appropriate right now, what’s healthy and good for me and rest of humanity, really.  And how self-centered to think that what I do might result in anything!  I’m trying to be a drop in the bucket, today and every day.

And so, my program applied to this.  I should be dependent upon my higher power.  When things are bad in my life, I should double down on my program.  I’m not doing that.  I believe in some kind of abstract way that the answers are there for me, but right here, right now, it seems like the main benefit of more program would be less mental time spent on politics.  Which wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.

I don’t feel like this reverie has added anything to anything, but I’m leaving it here if only to look back on and to see how I coped without drinking.  I’m not drinking.

2 thoughts on “Baleful Results (Step Three continued)

  1. What has happened in the USA has influence on the whole world. In my tiny circle in the tiny country of the Netherlands we even made the T-word forbidden during friendly get togethers because it spoils everything. I personally think it is wise to spend time restoring yourself. More than ever this world needs healthy, loving, balanced people. That would be a service, well, actually a protest to the insanity of this world. Sending love and hugs,
    xx, Feeling

  2. As with your last post, I so empathize with the diabolical pull of the current political situation, the feeling of “who am I to…”, and the desire to get away from all the stuff in one’s head. I agree with you that working the program is a way to get back into some semblance of personal balance. Maybe just give a doubled-down program a week? Just see how that goes? This not being a peace in my head is a vicious threat to my personal well-being, and keeps me from being as effective, even if only in the butterfly wing, pond ripple, or drop in the bucket way. I’m grateful that you are not drinking, Lydia… and I’m grateful for your posts.

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