I’m still in the “this day” mode.
I wrote about the death of a local AA member. The day of his funeral, two others of my local AA crowd got married. He would have been at the wedding. It’s not quite a baby being born, but it seems more than symbolic enough – life and death, future and past.
The couple who got married have not had an easy time of it, for many reasons. But several years now of right living has given them great rewards and amazing promise.
I’m reading another book that criticizes AA for several reasons, and it puts forth the old statement that there are more effective treatments for alcoholism than AA. What these critics don’t say is that we can’t possibly send someone to some kind of therapy, say, every day for 90 days. We can’t drive them there if they’ve lost their license. We can’t give them a list of people to call all hours of the day and night until someone answers, and we can’t give them positive role models of sobriety to emulate without AA.
A few hours ago I saw Robin Williams being interviewed by Diane Sawyer, and he said something like, “It waits. It doesn’t go away. It waits.” I’ve always kept that concept, and the word “insidious,” and the definition “patiently waiting for a chance to ensnare” close to my heart.
This is disjointed, I know, it’s just what’s been on my mind. Sometimes I’m struck with a feeling of unreality, like this really can’t be me, sober, at all, at last, and for so long.