February 3, 2014 (this day)

IMG_0998My daughter found a place to live, where she will move, to her dream job.  It is, I don’t know yet-11, 12, 13 hours from me by car.  It is in so many ways the fulfillment of all I tried to do as a mother.  It has worked out better than I ever would have hoped or dreamed.  And I am sad.  I want to spend more time with her than I’ll be able to.  And that’s a good thing.

 

Saturday morning, our dog woke up unwilling to put her right paw on the floor.  A few hours and lots of worry and pre-emptive sadness later, she has Lyme’s disease.  Today, Monday, she is already acting like nothing was ever wrong.  We took her with us on “vacation” and she brought home that souvenir.  Otherwise she is healthy, at probably 11 years old, and that’s a very good thing.

 

In anticipation of my daughter’s move I have increased the frequency of my meetings ever so slightly.  Instead of my home group every week plus one seven or eight days later, I’ve been doing my home group plus one six or seven days later.  This is probably not visible to the naked eye, but it’s significant to me.

 

This is a hard thing, but not really a hard time.  I’m very grateful that when I’ve had hard times in sobriety, I have turned to the program and the steps and not yet (since I got sober) to alcohol.  I believe that working and reworking the steps has increased my ability be serene given whatever.

 

But I do sort of wish I liked meetings more, or leaving my house more, or being around people more.  But I don’t.  So my introverted AA experience if sufficient today.

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