. . . the surety that we need no longer be square pegs in round holes but can fit and belong in God’s scheme of things–
For me one of the greatest gifts of Alcoholics Anonymous has been the opportunity to know so many people on such a deep level. I know that many people on the outside know it’s true that to some degree, most people feel they don’t belong or fit in, that there’s something different and usually wrong with them. It can seem like other people hold a key to friendships and relationships, work and study, that I just don’t have. Listening to thousands of stories in AA lets me know that this is a universal feeling, again to one degree or another.
Truly drinking I could not fit in any hole of any shape, and I believe now that I was actively working against God’s will by poisoning myself, wasting time and resources and generally being self-centered and destructive.
But of course sober I can feel that I’m still missing one or several vital ingredients in human nature. Now, I know that it’s not true.
The people I work with can teach me humility every day that I will let them. Some of them have very severe disabilities. I can easily see their place in God’s scheme of things. Or, for times when I can’t, like at times when I wonder why some people are born to suffer so, at least I can imagine that, because we’re all human, we’re all just a variation on each other. Including me.