Wait to Worry

I wrote last July about triggers, and what I was really thinking about are triggers to worry.  For me, I don’t know that resentment is the number one offender.  I spend far more self-destructive time worrying than I do being resentful.

Wait to worry is sometimes a good way for me to remember that most of what I worry about doesn’t happen.  A diagnosis, for example, while the tests are going on.  I can worry about the terrible disease once I know that it’s truly there.  There will be time enough.    I can worry about how much trouble my kids are in once they are in it.  I can worry about politics and pollution, my car and my dog when I know there’s something to worry about.

Which, of course, there never is.  Because worry (and fear) are destructive and they make everything worse, never better.  They make me worse and less effective than I can be when I’m calm and accepting.

Right now I’m worried about work tomorrow.  It’s usually the same thing I worry about, being short-staffed.  For several years now we’ve been well staffed because of the administrators, which is a very very good thing.  Now a series of events have made us short-staffed until we can hire some new people, which takes time.

And it’s all just part of it.  Worrying about it tonight will not make tomorrow any better, and it will surely lower the quality of tonight.  And it’s not justified, either.  There is no staff shortage so severe that we don’t get through the day.  I have never suffered in a short situation to such a degree that I lost my ability to cope.  I may be the only administrator at work tomorrow, and my attitude will surely affect the quality of the day (to quote Thoreau).

4 thoughts on “Wait to Worry

  1. As I continue in my recovery, I seem to worry less and less and this to me if very freeing. I remember back in a rehab facility, a statement was made, “It does no good to worry, when you do and every thing turns out ok, then it seems that all the worrying worked”. I know follow this theory.

    • I never thought of it that way, though I’ve thought at times that I’m acting like if I worry about something enough, it won’t happen. Magical thinking of the destructive kind.

  2. I should print this post and carry it around with me as a reminder! Fear and worry = soul death . I wasted enough time drinking…. It is real work for me now that I’m sober to not waste more in fear and worry. Thanks!

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