He Finds Himself in Possession of a Degree of Honesty (Step Twelve continued)

He finds himself in possession of a degree of honesty, tolerance, unselfishness, peace of mind, and love of which he had thought himself quite incapable.

It will be quite difficult for me to write about my honesty, tolerance, unselfishness, peace of mind and love without engaging that character defect, pride.  I also hope that, as someone who got sober very young, these attributes would have increased in me as I got older anyway.  They wouldn’t have, if I hadn’t stopped drinking, that is for sure.  In AA, having practiced and studied and heard about these things for so very long, I truly do hope they have increased in me.

Part of what I love about AA, though, is that when it comes to ideals, there is never enough.  AA has taught me that when I’m upset, there is something wrong with me.  Now I look to increase my tolerance, for example, of difficult people and difficult circumstances, to increase my peace of mind and serenity.  Alcohol is not an issue for me.  I don’t have to improve myself or drink, I don’t think.  But selfishly and altruistically I want to keep getting better, keep being better, and to acquire for myself more of those wonderful qualities.

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