In A.A. we have found that the actual good results of prayer are beyond question. They are matters of knowledge and experience. All those who have persisted have found strength not ordinarily their own. They have found wisdom beyond their usual capability. And they have increasingly found a peace of mind which can stand firm in the face of difficult circumstances.
This is what I’ve been trying to increase and cultivate in preparation for flying, and really for everything that causes me fear, anxiety and stress. For some time now I’ve been praying the prayers, writing them, thinking them and studying them in an organized and formal fashion, much more mindfully than I’ve ever done before.
I’ve gained knowledge of the prayer, prayers, and some sources including poets, authors and the Bible. I can’t really see how this increases my wisdom, but I hope it does. It does increase my peace of mind. I really hope it can stand firm in the face of difficult circumstances.
I think that in the past, when I faced flight and fear, I was much more confident in the program and the words of the program, though I have less reason to doubt it now than in the past. I think that might be part of getting older, with that increased sense of vulnerability, or it may be the fact that now I’ll be flying without children to care for. Or both. But that deserves its own post.