I honestly hate self-seeking and being the center or attention, or receiving too much attention at all. So a program that tells me not to seek myself fits me perfectly in that aspect.
Most self-seeking, I think, makes me think I’m either better than or less than. I seldom think of myself in terms of “I’m just like everyone else.” I mean I do think that, but it’s really as a discipline of AA that I do that. It can be automatic but it’s very intellectual, not at all emotional. When I think of myself emotionally, I pretty much think about things that are good, or things that are bad.
I have to think about myself in terms of a moral inventory and a daily inventory. I have to be very careful not to totally disparage all therapy as self-seeking pop psychology. Because I think so much of it is. When I see unhappy people who could work or contribute sit around and be depressed or constantly think about themselves and their depression, I think there is no other way for them to be but depressed. And I don’t mean that about people who have legitimate, disabling mental or physical illness, although I think that most of those people also need to have meaningful, contributing activity.
Lots of my prejudices shine through here, but it’s actually progress for me to understand I should not dismiss all therapy out of hand.