Prayer and meditation are our principal means of conscious contact with God.
We A.A.’s are active folk, enjoying the satisfaction of dealing with the realities of life, usually for the first time in our lives, and strenuously trying to help the next alcoholic who comes along. So it isn’t surprising that we often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something not really necessary. To be sure, we feel it is something that might help us to meet an occasional emergency, but at first many of us are apt to regard it as a somewhat mysterious skill of clergymen, from which we may hope to get a secondhand benefit. Or perhaps we don’t believe in these things at all.
At first I had no use for God or prayer or anything of that nature. I held hands at the end of meetings but I did not say the prayers. Through years of relapse and a certain desperation, I finally prayed, using prayers I had memorized. Over the past 25 years, my thoughts about what it means, when to do it, how to do it, have changed and grown, though I’m still very at sea about it.
I haven’t spent much time studying it or enlarging it, though I did start to try around 18 months ago, when I started this blog. Over that time I’ve worked with some new prayers, trying to memorize them in a way so I can call on them as easily as the first ones I learned, in childhood. I’m looking forward (sort of) to reading and writing and thinking about this step.