Progression

august09 012When I was new to AA, I heard, as most of us do, that alcoholism is a progressive disease that over time always gets worse, never better.  That to me is a mark of alcoholism, although some people may progress very slowly.

My progression was like lightening, and from the first drink I was a goner.  Within six years of my first drink I was unable to function.

When I got sober, they said that the disease progresses even when we don’t drink.  Nowadays I hear the expression that my disease is “doing push ups,” getting stronger while I don’t drink.  I imagine mine would have the strength of an earthquake by now.

That doesn’t sound scientific to me at all, more like folklore.  AA has taught me that all I can share is my experience and this is it.  When I picked up after 18 months I hoped I could start again at the beginning.  Or somewhere in the direction of the beginning.  And I could not.  For me, within days I was worse than I had ever been.  What they told me was true in my case.  I’m lucky I survived the experiment.

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