But in other instances only the closest scrutiny will reveal what our true motives were. There are cases where our ancient enemy, rationalization, has stepped in and has justified conduct which was really wrong. The temptation here is to imagine that we had good motives and reasons when we really didn’t.
Wow. I can see that so clearly sometimes in other people.
Going back to my debit side and considering my anger, I will record that this is my fourth day off in a row and anger has not been a problem for me at home these four days. That is far from always the case, and I certainly need to work on my anger as it involves my family members, but just now it’s not a problem. I haven’t been to work so I haven’t been angry there, but I go back tomorrow.
I have noticed that when a certain coworker of mine is in a good mood, it goes far towards giving me a good day. As soon as I realized that, I saw that also of course my mood may influence others toward the good and happy side, and so I’m mindfully trying to do that.
But I’m off track. My bad behavior at home and at work often begins with my anger. At work, I think it has mostly to do with the selfishness of others, or with their desire to control things that I rightfully should be controlling, things like the staff schedule.
I can’t think of a good example, and I’m going to try to pay attention to my debit side and to see what my motives are in situations of conflict.