I’m up to the last eleven years of my story. I moved myself and my kids and my cats 400 miles in 1998. Erika would be 13 that year, and Nicholas was 10.
When I was interviewing for my job, they asked me what my five year plan was. I said then that I really wanted stability, and to get the kids through school in the best way possible. I told the truth – I’m still at that job. To say I hate change is to put it mildly.
From then till now, I think the defining circumstance of my life has been bringing those kids, and especially that girl, through those years. Without writing details, I’ll say that at times it was very very difficult. Scary. Heart breaking and awful. I know that my experience in AA helped me and them through. I have no doubt at all. And we have all made it through to the end of that time when they were dependent.
So I’ve lived here eleven years. That is more AA experience than I had anywhere else, except for the place where I started. I have moved, I think, 13 times, and many of those times in sobriety. I’ve lived AA in a span of 3000 miles across, with some places in between. That is amazing to me. I don’t know and I can’t imagine how it could have been otherwise. I like to think that now, if I had to live without it, I could remain sober. I’m so glad I don’t have to live without it.
In all the places I’ve lived I’ve found the people of AA to be the best people in the world.
That said, since I’ve lived here longer than anywhere else but “home,” I have to say that some of the AA conventions upset me and I disagree with them. Now I don’t go to meetings anywhere else any longer, and the AA I grew up on could well have changed for the worse there, too. I’m also very aware that oldtimers frequently think AA is changing for the worse. That attitude, in part, spurred me on to begin this blog. I do disagree with some of the ways they “work it.” But it works. For me and so many others.