Willingness (prayer)

Let my heart be the vessel of God’ Love.

Let my thoughts be the blossom of God’s Love.

Let my words be the expression of God’s Love.

Let my actions be the fulfillment of God’s Love.

Willingness – David Ridge

Today at work I greeted everyone as if I was very glad to see them.  I was!  Even the disagreeable characters, like the parent who won’t speak to me, are characters in my drama.  They share this time and place with me and they are a part of me.  I helped everyone who needed help, without them asking me first, if I could anticipate it.  Every activity that I was a part of, I tried to truly be a part of, and to do it with a good attitude.

When I saw the boss’s boss talking to her, I wondered if they were talking about me and my badness.  I wondered for a few seconds, then hoped that if that was indeed what they were talking about, they would have at least closed the door.  Then I kept moving.  I was happy and enthusiastic and, what do you know?  Everyone really seemed to me to have a better attitude today.  Magic!

At church yesterday, I paid special attention to the parts about confession and absolution.  This is one area where I part company with the Lutherans.  I do not know if the Pastor knows if I am indeed forgiven.  I think it’s possible that God would say no, I am not.  Entirely possible.

The day before yesterday, at my meeting, the topic was ego-smashing.  Fun!  I wondered to the group if I could perhaps get by at some point with ego cracking, rather than a complete smash.  That remains to be seen.

I wish my good behavior now could shield me from what I did wrong in the past, but it won’t.  I think I’ve gotten a wake up call though.  Whether I continue on at my current job or have to look for another, I think I have a good chance of getting back the love of service that I had for so long, not such a long time ago.

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