The Fast Track to Gratitude

For me, that’s to have my situation threatened.  Threatened with losing what I have, I’m suddenly much more grateful for it.

I’ve had big and small and medium sized losses.  Lots of them over 24 years.  A few of them came at the same time about 18 months ago, and that contributes to my hard time.

Each time I vow to appreciate what I have more, knowing for real that it can be gone in a second.  And as I get older and experience more loss, I do get better at appreciating what I have when I still have it.

So making a long story short, my job was threatened today.  My job has never been secure.  That has become painfully obvious over the past 18 months.  People have been let go with no warning and no chance for change.  I understand that.

I am also in the most super excellent place to survive this situation.  Carole can support me, and recently, with same sex partner benefits, she has been able to insure me and my son as well.  She is very supportive of me doing what ever is best for me (if only I knew what that is).  So in practical terms, I have almost nothing to fear from possible job loss.  I know I am more fortunate than the vast majority of people in this respect.

But, I’ve been where I am for ten years, and I really really love the actual job.  I just can’t picture ever loving a job as much as I love this one.

So threatening it, I appreciate it more and more and more.  I also know, from years of practice, that I just don’t know what will happen moment to moment, and I surely don’t know what’s best for all involved.  In this case, that’s important, because the people with disabilities that I serve are much more important than I am, at least in this situation.  I honestly want what’s best for them, whatever that looks like to me.

I don’t know if God has an actual hand in these things.  Though I think it’s possible, I mostly guess that God doesn’t much care about the details.  As long as I am serving others I’m doing the right thing.  And there is so much need in the world, finding another way to serve should not be difficult.

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