Having carefully surveyed this whole area of human relations, and having decided exactly what personality traits in us injured and disturbed others, we can now commence to ransack memory for the people to whom we have given offense. To put a finger on the nearby and most deeply damaged ones shouldn’t be hard to do. Then, as year by year we walk back through our lives as far as memory will reach, we shall be bound to construct a long list of people who have, to some extent or other, been affected. We should, of course, ponder and weigh each instance carefully. We shall want to hold ourselves to the course of admitting the things we have done, meanwhile forgiving the wrongs done us, real or facied. We should avoid extreme judgments, both of ourselves and of others involved. We must not exaggerate our defects or theirs. A quiet, objective view will be our steadfast aim.
So it is again with great alarm that I saw when I turned the page that there are only a few more sentences left of this step. I’m still just not feeling it resonate. I went and quickly glanced at Step Nine, and I think that what I will do is skip to Step Ten. After 24 years of sobriety, I’m really glad I don’t feel I’ve surged like a wrecking ball through the lives of other people in the recent past. I think the daily inventory will be much more applicable. If after I work through Step Ten I’m still at a loss, I’ll rethink it.
So I’ll write here the last paragraph of Step Eight, and my next step work will be on Step Ten.
Whenever our pencil falter, we can fortify and cheer ourselves by remembering what A.A. experience in this Step has meant to others. It is the beginning of the end of isolation from our fellows and from God.
That helps. I began a long time ago. I hope I’ve gotten better at it through the years.
